My in-laws always remain strangers to me

By Quynh Hoa   May 15, 2024 | 03:45 pm PT
I feel very uncomfortable living with my husband’s family, despite my mother-in-law being easy to get along with.

At 30, I’m married and currently living with my in-laws, a decision that was entirely my husband’s idea. He believes that as the youngest child, it is his responsibility to take care of his parents. Additionally, he pointed out that we will be the beneficiaries of my parents-in-law, who own 13 land plots and a house on the outskirts of the city.

Even though my in-laws treat me quite well, I don’t feel comfortable living with them. When I was six months pregnant, my mother-in-law helped with household chores and took care of the baby after I gave birth. Now that I have given birth, while I pay for childbirth expenses and baby supplies, she covers food and utilities.

Since my newborn is still young, the only household chores I currently manage are washing dishes and hanging clothes to dry after washing. I haven’t returned to work yet either. My mother-in-law handles the cooking, but the food she prepares isn’t appetizing, and we mostly eat frozen food because our house is far from the market. I can eat very little of the dishes she cooks.

My mother-in-law is a bit nitpicking as well, though she normally doesn’t say anything directly to me even when she notices things I do that she doesn’t like.

Because of these reasons, I really don’t want to live with my in-laws. To me, they will always be strangers, not my family. Deep down, I really want to live with my parents, who are also over 60 and need someone to take care of. Not a single day do I feel happy being around my in-laws.

When I proposed my desire to my husband, he didn’t agree to move into my parents’ house with me.

What can I do to change his mind?

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