I am hesitant to get married because my future mother-in-law has been married 3 times

My boyfriend and I are both 25 years old and have been dating for two years. We earn similar monthly incomes, around VND15–20 million (US$585–780).

My family is stable—my parents are still young, financially secure, and able to support us if needed. In contrast, my boyfriend’s family situation is much more complicated. His mother, after divorcing his father, remarried two times and is now living with her third husband, with whom she has two children. She also has another daughter with her second husband. My boyfriend lives with his mother’s parents after his parents’ divorce.

Meanwhile, my boyfriend’s father has remarried as well and has two children with his second wife. The conflict between my boyfriend’s parents was so severe in the past that his father cut ties with him for many years. Despite this, my boyfriend continues to show respect and care for his paternal side, frequently visiting his grandparents.

Currently, the only close family member my boyfriend has is his maternal grandmother, who has always been very loving toward him. However, even this relationship is becoming strained. She is now elderly, and her other children and grandchildren—other than my boyfriend—do not take proper care of her. Whenever she has a problem, she complains and asks my boyfriend for help, which has led me to set a boundary: he can help within his means, as long as it doesn’t affect me or our future family.

My boyfriend’s mother’s daughter from her second marriage was raised by his maternal grandmother as well, with her father covering the costs of her education. My boyfriend’s mother couldn’t raise her, as she was financially supporting the two children she had with her third husband. Recently, no one has been able to contact the girl’s father, and now the responsibility of supporting his half-sister has fallen on my boyfriend.

The girl has also expressed that she only wants to live with my boyfriend, so it seems inevitable that he will be expected to provide for her university education. I understand this puts him in a difficult situation. I feel for him—he’s had to grow up without the support of his parents. But with our current income, we simply cannot afford all of this. I know his love for me is real, but I don’t feel confident starting a family under these circumstances.

What should I do?