Should I choose my love or the man my parents approve of?

By Nhu Ngoc   March 1, 2024 | 04:03 pm PT
My parents prefer to arrange a marriage for me with a man who isn’t my boyfriend.

At 25, I am considered attractive, hold a stable job, and hail from a reputable family. My boyfriend, in his 30s, is employed in marketing, earning between US$1,000-$1,500 a month. He is diligent, ambitious, abstains from alcohol and tobacco, is introverted, and communicates sparingly. His family resides in a Mekong Delta province, where his parents, now retired teachers, live. He also has a working younger sister.

Our bond has strengthened over a two-year period. He holds me in high regard, often yielding in our disputes. The thing is, although we have entertained the idea of marriage, my parents disapprove due to his lack of property ownership, fearing a future of hardship for me.

Conversely, the son of a wealthy acquaintance of my mother’s, who is of an eligible age and possesses desirable qualities, is favored by my parents as a suitable spouse. Our families share a close bond, making it a favorable match in their eyes. However, despite recognizing his kindness and stable employment, my feelings towards him remain purely platonic.

Torn between my devotion to my boyfriend and my filial obligations, I find myself at a crossroads. The profound affection I have for my boyfriend, nurtured over the last two years, makes the thought of separation excruciating. Yet, the advice of my aunt lingers; she cautions that love can change post-marriage and that financial strain can erode love, leaving me indecisive.

What path should I take?

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