My mother criticizes me for wanting my younger brother to move out

By Thu Phuong   August 26, 2024 | 03:00 pm PT
I planned for my younger brother to move out after his graduation, but this has led to criticism from my mother, who accused me of not caring for him.

My family consists of two siblings—me, the elder sister, and my younger brother. My husband owns a house in the city, so when my brother went to the city for college, he lived with us.

After about a year, I noticed he was very disorganized and messy with his eating habits. I discussed with my mother the idea of having him move out to live with his friends. This upset her, and she scolded me, saying we have our own home, yet I was making him endure the hardship of living in a rental. That issue eventually cooled down.

After living with his friends for about a year, my brother asked to move back into my house, promising to improve and be more orderly. My husband and I agreed, but old habits die hard, and he didn’t change. He leaves the lights on after using the bathroom and his washed clothes on the bed where he then sleeps, and when he uses the toilet, urine ends up all over the place.

Besides that, he’s quick to argue back. He thinks such minor issues can be easily resolved and that I shouldn’t get angry or make a big deal out of it.

Now, he’s about to graduate, and I plan to have him move out after graduation. However, this has led to my mother criticizing me once again for not caring about him. Meanwhile, at his age, I had already moved out and was fending for myself.

What should I do to make my parents understand and to re-educate my brother instead of criticizing me?

 
 
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