Parents' inheritance becomes a burden

August 13, 2024 | 02:58 pm PT
Parents' inheritance becomes a burden
Receiving an inheritance can be a burden for some people. Illustration photo by VnExpress/Ngoc Thanh
My mother-in-law always uses my husband’s inheritance to gain leverage against me and is never satisfied with my efforts to care for her.

To me, my in-laws' assets are a burden. I married into a family that has four daughters and a youngest son, who is my husband. Both of us are well-educated and earn enough money to buy a house and a car. However, since we got married, my parents-in-law have constantly reminded us and their four daughters that their properties will be reserved solely for their son. This has heavily strained the family dynamics.

Although my sisters-in-law are upset, they still care for their parents diligently and only mention their favoritism on occasion. My mother-in-law also frequently uses the inheritance to exert influence and pressure on me. No matter how much my husband and I did for her and how respectful we were, she was never satisfied.

She often said that I, as her daughter-in-law, would also get her money through my husband, so I should naturally have more responsibility. After living with my in-laws for 13 years, my husband and I decided to move out on our own without getting anything from them. We also told them that we did not need preferential treatment regarding inheritance.

Initially, they were very angry, but eventually, they understood and gradually accepted reality. Now, my in-laws' assets no longer serve as a point of contention in our relationship with them. They have come to appreciate my contributions. Overall, our relationships have significantly improved.

Reader Hang Hoang

Other readers have shared their opinions on the topic:

Reader daimabao2007:

"I am also my family’s only son, but my perspective is different. I neither ask for nor want any inheritance or my parents’ assets. I prefer to amass my own wealth and take responsibility for my own life. While filial duties are important, my parents’ properties should be reserved for their own needs. I have told my parents that they should not bother saving money just for me. Life is short and there is no need for them to struggle for my sake since I am already independent. I also mentioned that if they pass away, I will donate their assets to charity."

Reader BS Hung:

"I have a younger sister and my stance on inheritance is very clear: If my sister demands a share, I am fully willing to give her half of mine because sibling relationships are more important than money. My parents’ assets only amount to a few billion dong (VND1 billion = US$39,800). However, she must understand that she would then also be responsible for the costs of caring for our parents.

As for my wife's family, her brothers always fear that their sisters will take over the family land. They want to keep all of the properties for themselves but are unwilling to spend money on their parents' medical care. There have even been instances where, when the parents were ill, the brothers tried to avoid responsibility and forced their sisters to handle everything.

As a son-in-law, I usually help my wife take care of her parents. Nonetheless, if the brothers continue to be irresponsible while their parents are severely ill, it will cause great distress to the family."

What are your thoughts on these stories?

*This opinion was translated into English with the assistance of AI. Readers’ views are personal and do not necessarily match VnExpress’ viewpoints.

 
 
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