Educating children is better than leaving inheritance

By Dung   September 17, 2023 | 10:49 pm PT
Educating children is better than leaving inheritance
A mother encourages her son before a high-school entrance exam in Ho Chi Minh City, June 2023. Photo by VnExpress/Quynh Tran
There is no good ending to parents spending all their time trying to make enough money to leave their children while forgetting to teach them how to live a good life.

I and my husband have a full life without receiving any inheritance from our parents. I believe that children should be grateful for their parents' efforts in bringing them up and have no right to expect an inheritance. Any money or assets earned by the parents belong to them, and parents are not obliged to share them with their children. Demanding a part of their parents' money is greedy of the children, and is not helpful for their growth.

Remember the butterfly parable: It's trying to get out of its cocoon when a person decides to help by cutting the chrysalis open. That does not help at all, as butterflies release a chemical when they're getting out of their chrysalis and that chemical strengthens their wings. By getting out of the chrysalis on their own, they can spread their wings and fly and be really free.

By getting help from the person, the butterfly does not have a chance to try its best, so it cannot spread strong wings and cannot survive in the wild.

Some fights and struggles in life are sometimes the exact thing that we need in life. If we go through life easily with no challenges and with everything laid out for us, we might become disabled somehow. We cannot be strong enough to stand on our own. We cannot fly and grow as best as we're supposed to.

Difficulties are a chance for one to build up their capability and resilience, so they can move on in life overcoming all challenges instead of sitting and moaning about the fact that their parents are not rich enough to leave them some assets.

My grandfather's friends had a huge piece of land in Hanoi and they shared it between their four sons. The sons then built four huge houses over it, but none invited the parents to live with them.

The old couple then put up a makeshift house on public ground along the Red River to live. They died there.

That's one example of what I said earlier, that if parents only leave a financial inheritance and do not teach their children to be good people, there's no happy ending. The children who only wait to inherit something from their parents will never think it's enough.

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