My parents call me 'eccentric' for not marrying at 30

I enjoy my independence, and frankly, men often annoy me. I am content with my life, but my parents continue to pressure me into marriage.

I’ve come to realize that I’m not suited for traditional family life. The idea of managing a household or being in a relationship doesn’t appeal to me. Seeing men approach me makes me uncomfortable, and I constantly look for ways to avoid any potential romantic interactions. I’ve told my parents repeatedly that I’m not interested in men.

I’ve never felt the desire to care for someone else, as I still struggle to take proper care of myself. How could I possibly look after someone else when I don’t feel equipped to do so? I don’t have any expectations of a relationship, marriage, or the need for someone to take care of me.

The thought of having children and raising a family doesn’t excite me either. Sure, I enjoy playing with kids occasionally, but only for brief moments. The idea of being responsible for a family every day overwhelms me, and I simply don’t see myself fitting into that role. Just the thought of it stresses me out.

Instead, I prefer spending time on my own or with my older sister or best friend. I don’t have much interest in socializing, hanging out with colleagues, or traveling. My life feels complete with my sister by my side, and that’s enough for me.

A young woman. Illustration photo by Unsplash/Tyler Casey

However, my parents see things differently. My father calls me an "oddball," while my mother laments that she raised me with the hope I’d settle down with a peaceful, stable family. While I understand their feelings and empathize with their wishes, I can’t live my life based on someone else’s expectations.

I’ve often heard that while parents give birth to their children, personalities are shaped by fate. I can’t follow their wishes just to satisfy them. Should I marry a rich man just because it would make my parents happy? That wouldn’t be fair to me—or to him.

Who would support me if I end up in a miserable marriage, forced into it by societal pressure? Will my parents or those who pushed me into marriage bear the consequences with me if things go wrong? It’s unrealistic to think they would.

For the past decade, I’ve promised myself that I won’t marry. I’ll navigate life on my own terms, no matter how difficult the path may be. At least the choices I make are mine, and I live for my own happiness. It’s better to be true to myself than to live a life designed to please others.