Do celebrations of Women's Day or Men's Day lead to meaningful change in behavior?

He, employed in the public sector, manages the family's savings, including bank accounts, investments and cash. My friend, working in the private sector, contributes the larger share of their financial stability.

At home, the tasks are shared seamlessly: he takes charge of cleaning and washing dishes, while she prepares meals and handles the laundry. They exchange small gifts like clothes and footwear, and when one has a business trip, the other helps with packing. This cooperative dynamic has defined their marriage since day one.

For two times a year, Vietnam joins the global celebration of women on March 8 (International Women’s Day) and Oct. 20 (Vietnamese Women's Day). Corporations and organizations flood social media with messages promoting female equality. In this context, my friend’s family stands as a humble yet powerful example of what true gender equality looks like: simple, cooperative and empowering.

Flowers, gifts and parties abound in offices and homes across Vietnam during these celebrations, accompanied by the warmest compliments and wishes. Yet, despite these gestures, there is a persistent question: Do such celebrations lead to meaningful change in behavior and perception?

The media often highlights the roots and repercussions of gender inequality, showcasing its adverse effects on women. Studies and surveys emphasize the need for men to rethink their roles and behavior. However, how many men actually internalize these lessons and reflect on their behavior long after the flowers have wilted and the celebrations have ended?

Psychological and pedagogical research tells us that people remember only what aligns with their existing beliefs. Sigmund Freud's psychoanalysis explains that humans subconsciously engage in defense mechanisms such as denial, avoidance, rationalization, or deflection to protect themselves from uncomfortable truths. This often means that many men forget, or choose not to remember, what challenges their worldview. For them, Women’s Day celebrations might serve as a superficial distraction: a ritual that temporarily conceals the everyday reality of gender inequality. Once the celebrations are over, women often return to the status quo, facing systemic bias alone.

Moreover, while education and social media campaigns on gender equality are well-meaning, they sometimes create unsustainable empowerment by focusing solely on equality without acknowledging natural differences, such as maternity. This approach risks oversimplifying complex gender roles and expectations.

Interestingly, Nov. 19, International Men's Day, has recently gained more recognition, emphasizing men’s contributions and struggles. While it is true that women face more pronounced gender inequality, men also battle pressures tied to traditional roles, resulting in mental health challenges. Yet, will women view this development empathetically, or will they feel that acknowledging men's struggles undermines their own?

Reflecting on gender equality education, I often compare these programs to flashy roadshow cars: loud, attention-grabbing, and yet fleeting. These efforts may raise awareness, but without deeper context, foundational knowledge or actionable guidance, they rarely create lasting change.

However, there are initiatives aiming for deeper impact. The social media campaign "House with Many Pillars," backed by Investing in Women, an Australian government-funded initiative, is one such example. This campaign highlights that both men and women can be breadwinners or homemakers, depending on individual circumstances and preferences, all deserving of respect.

Such approaches do not pit one gender against another, but empower both. Only through recognizing and respecting the diverse roles men and women can play will society move towards dismantling gender stereotypes for good. True progress will come not from fleeting gestures or surface-level campaigns, but from lasting, inclusive cultural shifts that value all contributions.

*Nguyen Minh Hoang is a social activist.