Unsuccessful job hunting prompts me to doubt my competence

By Xuan Duc   January 4, 2024 | 03:54 pm PT
I used to think holding a university degree would secure me a job with a good salary, but it turned out I was wrong.

Spending two months relentlessly hunting for jobs only to get failures in return, I started to think I was probably not skilled enough. The thought made me ponder in my room every night and undergo a period of depression and reticence. Scrolling through social media and seeing my peers post about their successful jobs and careers only made me feel even more inferior.

I tried to put myself together with the help of some motivational content I came across. After days of confining myself at home, I began going to the gym and took an unpaid internship at a pharmacy. I then landed a job at a supermarket, which paid me a probation monthly salary of VND4.2 million (US$172), and I have been juggling these two jobs simultaneously to avoid relying financially on my parents.

I initially thought working at a supermarket would be easy, but I was mistaken again. I struggled with tasks like lifting beer crates, stacking milk cartons, calculating change I have to give the customers, and checking inventory. This led to my colleagues having a poor impression of me, as if they were afraid to entrust me with any tasks.

There was one time when a few Western customers dropped by the supermarket where I was working. Seeing how my colleagues managed to communicate with them with fluent English while I could not was a shocking realization to me. Despite holding a university degree, I felt inferior to people who had only completed high school. I realized I lacked many skills: soft skills, English proficiency, and confidence. I felt useless and fell into depression again.

I really want to quit my supermarket job to pursue a career in pharmaceutical, which I really prefer, but I am afraid of not performing well and not earning enough money to support myself.

My parents bought a large house last year and took a substantial bank loan, and the current economic challenges are making it difficult for them to pay the interest. Therefore, I am afraid of adding to their burden by quitting my supermarket job and not having enough money to take care of myself.

What should I do now?

 
 
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