I am 28 years old, and my husband is 33. We have two children, aged five and two, and I am currently five months pregnant with our third child.
My monthly income is around VND15-16 million, while my husband earns a fixed salary of VND35 million. He started earning an additional income of VND10-20 million a month recently; however, it is occasional, not on a monthly basis.
I spend my entire salary on the family every month, including paying for our two children’s kindergarten fees, groceries, bills, and sometimes gifts for both of our parents. Unforeseen expenses always arise.
Sometimes, I buy personal items for myself as well, since my pregnancy is progressing and some clothes no longer fit me. The same goes for our children: I have to buy new clothes for them every time a new season arrives. When my husband runs out of money, I also give him some to cover his personal expenses like commuting, phone bills, and eating out.
We have a debt of about VND900 million, which we borrowed when we built our house. We spend VND30-50 million a month on paying off this debt.
The problem is, I have no issue with my husband when he spends his money on his hobbies, like buying ornamental plants and koi fish for home decoration. However, he told me that I spent too much and our household’s expenses were too high.
He said we need to cut back on certain expenses as we are still in debt and are expecting another child. He also criticized me for not contributing to the debt repayment. He even questioned whether I was making any investments as I was spending too much.
I was surprised and aggrieved because I detailed everything I spend money on to him, and he has always agreed with them. But now he says this, making me confused about whether I am in the wrong.
Do you think I spend too much money? What should I do?