I worry about upsetting my parents by marrying girlfriend from different background

By Hoang Tien   February 19, 2024 | 03:12 pm PT
My family advises me to consider the relationship with my girlfriend because our families are far apart, both geographically and in terms of circumstances.

My girlfriend and I have been together for nearly four years now. My family resides in Ho Chi Minh City and works for the government, while my girlfriend’s family is from a province in the Mekong Delta region, and she came to Ho Chi Minh City for work. I visited her hometown once, where her house is deep in the countryside, but it was well-maintained and respectable.

However, upon learning about our relationship, my family suggested I think it over because of the significant distance between our families, both geographically and in backgrounds, which could complicate future support from the extended family. Not to mention that it is challenging to travel between the two houses in cases of special anniversaries or emergencies.

I was not considering starting a family at that time, so I just nodded and let what my family said pass. However, as I began to think about marriage and recall what my parents previously mentioned, I realized that my parents would have to travel quite a distance to discuss things with my girlfriend’s family if I marry her.

It will take them an estimated five to six hours by car to arrive at my girlfriend’s hometown. Upon arrival, we’d need to ride a motorbike for another one or two kilometers because automobiles can’t reach her house directly.

My parents hold a certain social status, so I don’t know what they would think about this situation. I’m afraid my parents will be upset if I choose to tie the knot with someone with such a different family background. However, the thought of breaking up would be painful for both of us.

What steps should I take now?

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