My wife has looked down on me since inheriting 2 land plots

By Hoang Ha   September 29, 2024 | 03:28 pm PT
After my in-laws gave us two plots of land, my wife called me incompetent, a deadbeat clinging to his wife, and a nuisance.
My wife called me incompetent after her parents gave us two plots of land. Illustration photo by VnExpress/Quynh Tran

My wife called me incompetent after her parents gave us two plots of land. Illustration photo by VnExpress/Quynh Tran

I am 41 years old, and my wife is 39. We have been married for 11 years and have two daughters. Initially, our life together was joyful. I was quite handsome, sociable, and operated my own company. My wife, working in the spa industry, is charming though not highly educated, which sometimes limits her conversational abilities.

After a period of financial success, where I was the primary breadwinner, I faced a major setback in 2018, losing all my capital. This led to daily domestic disputes. Initially, I attempted to maintain peace, and my wife remained silent. During this period, I drove our daughters to and from school for two years while exploring various job opportunities to support our family. Despite my efforts in roles such as a delivery driver, broker, and import-export paperwork handler, the tough job market left us consistently short on funds.

At the time, my wife handed daily expenses management to my mother, a decision I did not challenge.

In 2019, my wife’s parents gave us two pieces of land as inheritance to aid us financially. Trusting my wife, I agreed to have the land titles in her name alone.

I then began buying and selling property, increasing our assets from VND3 billion (US$121,902) to VND4 billion. I managed all transactions, while my wife provided the necessary funds. However, financial stresses continued to exacerbate strains in our marriage.

I proposed selling a plot to raise VND300 million for opening a pho restaurant, considering our future needs as we age. Even if the restaurant faltered, I reasoned we could invest in land near my wife’s family home. Yet, she became increasingly indifferent, then hostile, frequently labeling me as incompetent, dependent on her, and a nuisance.

The climax of her disdain was when she decided to move out. Initially, she missed our daughters, and they stayed with her every night. I made several visits, earnestly discussing our issues, but she was unmoved and began pushing for a divorce with cutting remarks. Out of self-respect and a sense of male dignity, I ceased visiting.

We have lived apart for the past year and a half, and since the school year started in September, my daughters stopped staying overnight with her due to their school’s proximity to my home. My wife now lives alone, and I am unsure of her activities or company.

Recently, I noticed several men engaging flirtatiously with her on social media, which she seems too busy to moderate. Additionally, she has updated her profile picture to one featuring only herself, replacing our previous family photo.

Our family is now disintegrating, and despite my efforts to maintain our bond and happiness, they have been fruitless. Perhaps with her newfound financial independence, she feels she no longer needs me. Yet, I have always been a provider and never wished her harm. Our relationship has not lacked intimacy. I am still hoping for her return.

What should I do now?

 
 
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