My mother-in-law manipulates my husband to undermine me to enforce my obedience

Previously, my mother-in-law’s visits filled me with dread, leading me to believe I was simply afraid of her. However, I later recognized that my actual fear stemmed from the dynamics between her and my husband.

Like many men, my husband’s closeness and obedience to his mother often result in his irritability and alienation from me and our children. Despite the agreements my husband and I made prior to our marriage, my mother-in-law’s ongoing interference in how her son behaves within our marriage has nearly shattered these pacts. The bond between spouses, regardless of its initial strength, tends to weaken over the years and cannot withstand the familial ties that have developed over decades.

To mitigate fear of the mothers-in-law, women should maintain only a formal relationship with their in-laws, establish clear boundaries, avoid excessive familiarity or self-deprecation, and interact with their husbands as co-parents adhering to their marital vows. Often, the more one yearns for something, the less likely others are to provide it, and instead, they may seek to withhold it. Ignoring this dynamic can sometimes lead to a natural return of affection.

Do you agree with my perspective?