Why are women being pushed into becoming single moms?

By Hoa Binh   December 9, 2022 | 03:36 pm PT
Why are women being pushed into becoming single moms?
Silhouettes of a woman carrying a child. Illustration photo by Pixabay
"I will be 39 this year. If I don't do it soon, I might never get the chance again," a close colleague at work confided in me.

This single colleague of mine is approaching 40, and so people have been telling her that she should have a child so she will have someone "to take care of her when she gets old."

Having known her for more than a decade, I don't really understand why she chose to be single. But I have witnessed two stages in her life.

When she was about to turn 30, her parents often urged her to get married. By the time she entered her 30s, her relatives also urged her to get married, but as her choices were getting more limited, their suggestion to "just get married" was just empty advice.

My colleague once took a leave of absence to go back to her hometown for a few days. When she went back to work, she giggled and said that her parents had forced her to go back to meet a guy six years older than her, who was divorced.

And now, 10 years later, her relatives and friends give some new advice: "It's okay to have children without a husband." In other words, they will persuade her to become a single mother.

I don't judge single mothers as I'm sure they all have their own circumstances. This is likely often due to failed marriages, and if that’s the case, I feel very sorry for them.

But why are so many middle-aged single women, who have never been married, like my colleague, being persuaded to "bear a child to have someone to accompany you when you get old"?

Raising a child is not easy, so let’s allow single women to live however they want. We as outsiders should not offer unsolicited advice, even if we fear that they will be lonely someday and will not have any one to take care of them when they get sick. If single women cave into this pressure, they may be making a mistake that they can never take back.

The opinions expressed here are personal and do not necessarily match VnExpress's viewpoints. Send your opinions here.
go to top