What should I do with my overly calculating husband?

By Hoa Hong   April 24, 2023 | 03:04 pm PT
Before we met, my husband had been scammed by a few women, losing quite a lot of money and assets. After we got together, he helped me build a house and helped with my business.

My salary is just enough to cover my monthly expenses, but I still manage to put aside a very small amount to pay for some fixed yearly expenses.

My husband has now retired but he still earns more than VND100 million ($4,261) in monthly income. He keeps all of it, only buys things that he needs and gives money to whoever he wants, but he doesn’t give me a single penny.

I have to spend my own money for Tet and other holidays and take care of our meals every day too. My husband even asked me to give him back the money he gave me for the house.

He asks me to do everything, regardless of whether I want to or not. He is allowed to turn the lights on while using his phone while I have to sit in the dark. He turns the volume all the way up while watching TV or listening to music, then has an attitude when I tell him to turn it down a little bit.

I have to spend the money I saved the whole year to pay him back, and I will likely continue to do so for the next 10 years. How can we keep living like this as husband and wife? I used to be an active, lively and happy woman, but not anymore.

Ever since my husband retired, I turned into a completely different person. I get sad, I calculate every single penny and have to think very carefully before I buy anything.

Hope you can give me some advice.

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