My husband died only four months into our marriage, leaving me three months pregnant. I had hoped for compassion from my in-laws as I faced raising our child alone, but it was not forthcoming. They have consistently treated me as an outsider, suspicious and distant. Initially, I attributed their coldness to my newness in the family and refrained from confronting them, but things haven’t improved as time has passed.
We were living in a small rental and owned little, the most significant being my husband’s motorbike, which my in-laws claimed, promising to return it later. They also took control of his survivor benefits, ostensibly saving them for our child’s future, and even the savings we intended for a future home were kept by my mother-in-law. Unbeknownst to them, my husband had shared these details with me in confidence. To my face, they maintained that they had not taken any money and were struggling financially themselves. I remained silent, considering it their retirement provision.
The situation worsened when my child became ill, and my father-in-law blamed me for bringing misfortune to both my husband and child. They misconstrued my actions and maligned me to my mother, portraying me as manipulative and horrible. It became clear then that their kindness was merely a pretense. Beneath it, they resented me, monitored me closely, and were calculating in their actions. Their supposed care was a facade.
Overwhelmed with anger, I was tempted to confront them to defend my integrity, but my mother advised against it, cautioning that it might exacerbate our tensions and complicate future relations, important for my child’s connection to their paternal family.
Torn and disturbed by their accusations, I struggled. Despite my generally gentle, timid nature, their sharp, critical comments often tempted me to sever ties and raise my child independently.
What should I do?