Inside the Silicon Valley etiquette school that teaches young founders style, confidence, and caviar manners

"It’s a new world," said Sam Lessin, general partner at Slow Ventures, addressing attendees at the private meetup at the Four Seasons Hotel on Nov. 5.

"Tech is no longer playful and cute. It’s taking people’s jobs and changing environments. Everyone’s threatened by it, which means you need to be like, ‘I’m here and respectful,’ as opposed to ‘I’m here and intentionally disrespectful.’"

Lessin, an investor and former Facebook employee, said he launched the class after realizing that many young founders in San Francisco could not write an email or put together an appropriate outfit, according to the San Francisco Standard. "They don’t really understand anything about etiquette or how to interact in the world," he said on his podcast "More or Less."

Participants at the Slow Ventures' "Etiquette Finishing School" listen to a group of speakers. Photo courtesy of Sam Lessin's Instagram

He admitted that the etiquette school began as a joke, but after surverying interest, he found that many "AI kids" wanted to learn how to pair wine with seafood and maintain eye contact during a conversation. The free class, which also offered complimentary food, wine and gift bags, drew a few hundred applicants, though only about 50 were accepted, and not all attended.

One anonymous founder said he joined to learn how to be "less feral," after realizing during a meeting with a Japanese conglomerate that he had no idea how to be a "functioning adult in polite society." Marie Paoli, cofounder of AI startup Mellow, said she hoped to refine her social skills ahead of fundraising.

The event covered three themes: styling tips for workwear, conversation etiquette, and a caviar tasting session. In the first part, style advisor Chris Deehan from Wilkes Bashford warned against flashy logos and mismatched colors. For investor meetings, he recommended men wear cashmere suits and either a tie or pocket square, suggesting turtlenecks as an appropriate alternative during winter months, Business Insider reported

Speakers in the conversation segment suggested icebreakers such as asking what show someone is watching on Netflix or what fiction book they recently read. Lessin emphasized the importance of situational awareness, saying: "You need to be interesting beyond your company. Approach situations with a low heart rate and think about what you can give instead of take."

The final session featured a caviar lesson led by Geoffrey Chen of the Caviar House & Prunier Group. He advised using a mother-of-pearl spoon to preserve flavor and shared a "rule to live by": always order Champagne, never rosé.

Despite the lighthearted atmosphere, attendees said the most valuable lessons came from Lessin’s reflections. "I liked what he said about taking a breath and lowering your blood pressure before you enter a room," said Paoli. Toronto-based founder Maxim Sindall added: "The highlight for me was what Sam said about having an abundance mindset. There’s always more opportunities around the corner."