I thought I won at life by retiring at 35, until reality hit me hard

For years, I had earned around $3,000 a month, collected stock options, lived simply and saved religiously.

Like so many inspired by the FIRE (Financial Independence, Retire Early) movement, I dreamed of finally breaking free. I pictured peaceful days in Da Lat or Hoi An, reading books, sipping coffee and escaping the endless grind. When I finally walked away from my job, I believed I had won: early retirement at 35 felt like the ultimate life hack.

In the beginning, everything felt perfect. I woke up whenever I wanted. I traveled, exercised, devoured my reading list, started blogging, took up photography, painting... all the hobbies my busy career had put on hold. But as the months stretched into years, something shifted. My friends still had stories to tell: new projects, office drama, career wins and losses. I, on the other hand, had nothing new to share. I had read my books. Traveled enough. Finished my hobbies. The excitement faded. The world kept moving forward. I wasn't.

I tried to fill the void: writing, teaching online, investing. But none of it gave me the sense of value or direction I once had. By the time I approached 40, I realized I craved something I hadn't expected: structure, challenge, purpose. I wanted to work again, not for money, but for meaning.

That's when I hit another wall. Employers saw my years out of the workforce as a red flag. My skills were outdated. My long gap raised too many questions. Companies politely, or bluntly, told me they needed people who could "keep up with today's pace." Re-entering the job market wasn't just about wanting to work again, it was about fighting years of professional irrelevance. And fighting alone.

I still have savings that allow me to live comfortably. But I've learned a hard truth: retirement isn't just about freedom from work; it's about freedom with purpose. Stopping completely, without a long-term plan for growth or contribution, can leave you drifting. If I could go back, I would still slow down, but not stop cold. I would cut back hours gradually, pivot into part-time work, start learning new skills, or consult. I wouldn't sever all professional ties so suddenly.

If you're dreaming of early retirement because you want to "finally live," ask yourself: do you know what living actually means once the novelty fades? Because sometimes, the freedom we chase isn't true freedom; it's just another kind of emptiness we weren't ready for.