I started adult life furious at my parents for holding out on $114,000 inheritance

When I was young, I often resented my parents over inheritance. I felt frustrated and pitiful whenever my friends talked about how their parents had given them land or property deeds when they were just in their early twenties. Back then, I thought of my parents as "difficult," clinging to their assets until the very end and refusing to give their children a financial head start even though they owned land worth VND3 billion (US$114,000).

Whenever I complained to them about the topic, they only remained silent. At the time, I only felt annoyed at their old-fashioned thinking.

But life changed my mind. I graduated and joined a small company with a salary of VND3 million a month, barely enough for a frugal life. If I wanted to buy a new motorbike, I had to save for an entire year. Once when the company suffered losses and did not pay my salaries for six months, I had to work as a waiter at a café just to get by. Many nights, lying in bed exhausted, I thought: "If only I had a few hundred millions from my parents, I could have opened a shop and avoided all this struggle."

Yet those hard months forged resilience. I learned to adapt, find opportunities and sharpen my skills. When I later joined a larger design firm, I knew how to negotiate salary and assert my value. When I eventually launch my own business, uncertainty no longer haunted me because I had already experienced starting from nothing.

Step by step, I bought my first small house with my own earnings. Soon after, I bought a car without a loan. As my business grew, I hired employees. The joy of holding the key to a home I had built with my own blood and sweat far outweighed any head start I could have been given.

When my parents passed away, I finally received their property, which by that point had doubled or even tripled in value. Holding the property deeds, I cried, not out of joy for the windfall, but because I understood: my parents’ decision not to give me the inheritance early was not out of selfishness. They wanted me to stand on my own, to become independent.

That inheritance no longer defined my success; it was a final acknowledgement: "We trusted you, and you made it."

If my parents had given me the house and land early, I might have become dependent, spent recklessly and never learned to persevere and that wealth might have been squandered by now. Because my parents held onto it until the end, I learned to value every cent I earn, understand the worth of labor and take pride in my achievement.

Now, looking back, my resentment has matured into gratitude. I am thankful that my parents did not give in to my impatience or impulsiveness and allowed me to fend for myself, so that when I finally received their assets, I saw them not as a lifeline but as a gesture of love. For me, the greatest inheritance my parents left was that lesson: to build your own life—and that is something that cannot be taught any other way.

*This opinion was submitted by a reader. Readers’ views are personal and do not necessarily match VnExpress’ viewpoints.